News and Bout Info

Summer Smash-Up in Dundalk

The Kingston Derby Girls made their way to Dundalk, Ontario (we had to Google it too) this weekend for Summer Smash-Up, hosted by Fergus Roller Derby. The Disloyalists took on the Fergus Feims (we had to look that up too: apparently “feim” is Gaelic for “violent heat”) and fought hard but the Feims took the win 154 to 96. Next up, a Dead Rogues smashup team skating in Dead Red went up against GTAR’s Derby Debutantes. The lead changed almost every jam, it seemed, in this neck and neck battle, and your Kingston Derby Girls came out on top with a final score of 204 to 182. Congratulations to both KDG teams!

Cross-Border Battle

The Skateful Dead crossed the border last night to take on the Port City Sirens in the War of Sk8teen Twelve and the teams were well matched. Both teams fought hard and no one could predict who would come out on top. In the end, your hometown team in red, the Skateful Dead, took the win 251 to 241. Let’s do it again soon, New York State!

Training with Jess Bandit

Tonight we were lucky enough to host Jess Bandit of Montreal Roller Derby’s New Skids on the Block and Team Canada. Thanks so much for coming, Jess, and for the great blocking tips and strategy!

International roller derby hits Kingston

This guest post is brought to you by Rogue Warrior co-captain Red Nasty.

Saturday night saw two hard-fought battles on Canadian soil as our Kingston Derby Girls took on Port City Roller Derby of Oswego, New York. The teams were well-matched and both bouts were action-packed to the last jam.

Port City’s Breakwall Bombshells started out strong against the Disloyalists, taking a five-point lead with an apex jump in the first jam. Skateful Dead jammer Caume-a-Kazi, playing with the Disloyalists for the game, quickly closed the score gap, and TyKnee Smasher brought the Disloyalists to a 12-point lead with a power jam. By halftime, it was anyone’s game with a score of 101 to 83 in the Bombshells’ favour. Disloyalist blockers Madge and Willard (and guest Frigger Skater of the Skateful Dead) laid some heavy hits, but the Bombshells proved to be a second-half team, winning the bout with a final score of 215 to 170.

Kingston’s Rogue Warriors took the track for the second bout, facing off against the Port City Sirens. The Sirens racked up points right away in the first half, despite Rogues Nikki Heat and Kimminent Danger taking lead jammer early in the period. More aggressive blocking from the Rogue Warriors held the Sirens at bay, and rookie jammer Fist N’ Shout! took the Rogues to a lead of 79 to 77 in the last jam of the period. In the second half, the Rogues advanced their lead with blockers Sparta Kiss and Manic Breeze mercilessly hitting the Sirens’ jammer out of bounds. The Rogues beat out the Sirens with a final score of 197 to 153.

KDG would like to give a big thank you to our fantastic audience members for their support, and to all of our refs, officials, and volunteers for their dedication and hard work. Stay tuned for our next home bout on September 6, featuring all three of Kingston’s teams! Finally, don’t forget to like us on Facebook and follow us on Twitter for news, updates, and chances to win tickets to upcoming bouts.

International roller derby hits Kingston this Saturday

This guest post has been penned by Rogue Warrior co-captain Red-Nasty.

Get ready to watch some international action this Saturday as the Kingston Derby Girls face off against the USA’s Port City Roller Derby in Can-Am Slam!

Hailing from Oswego, New York, two of Port City’s teams will be competing in this double-header on Canadian soil. First up, at 6:30, the Breakwall Bombshells will take on our very own Disloyalists. The Bombshells have been officially undefeated so far this season, but the Disloyalists are returning from last month’s decisive win over the Durham Derby Devils and are hungry for more. Veteran jammers and blockers like LaVallee of the Dolls and Banger Management will be tearing up the track alongside Cat O’Clysm and Fist ‘N’ Shout!, newly drafted from the Rogue Warriors. The Disloyalists were defeated in their encounter with the Breakwater Bombshells last year, but with the help of new coaches Vincent and Vincent, they hope to turn the tables.

The second game of the night starts at 8:30, when Kingston’s Rogue Warriors trade bruises with the Port City Sirens. Crowd favourite Kimminent Danger will be jamming and blocking as the Rogues’ most menacing triple threat, while veteran blockers Bluestocking and Fate Tempter stop the Siren’s jammer in her tracks. Rookies Tara F. N. Headoff and the Blockness Monster will round out the Rogues’ impressive roster. Following a close loss to the Skateful Dead in their last home game, the Rogues are ready for a comeback.

As always, beer and snacks will be available from the Mansion’s trackside beer garden. Bring a chair for suicide seating if you want to get up close and personal while you cheer on your hometown (and home country) teams. Kingston hasn’t seen a battle like this since 1812! Doors open at 5:30 at the Memorial Centre (303 York Street). Tickets are $10 and are available online, at the door, or in Kingston at the Mansion, Digigraphics, Novel Idea, the Sleepless Goat, Chumleigh’s, and Blossoms.

Humans of KDG: Caume-a-Kazi!

What is your name? Your derby name?

My proper name is Tanya but you can call me Caume-a-Kazi

When did you join KDG?

I was inducted into the awesome world that is KDG on May 3rd 2014, best Saturday of my life to date!!

What is your role in the league (skater, ref, NSO, etc.)?

I skate with the Skateful Dead

What committee(s) are you on?

I am a member of PMS and VAG….. Wait, am I still talking about committees here??

What do you love most about derby?

Apart from the thrill of breaking through the pack first, I love the camaraderie that exists between players/teams regardless of outcome. To watch two jammers dancing with each other on the line during time-outs and an opposing team celebrating around their chosen rival MVP sets derby apart from other sports.

What do you do in your “real life” (for fun, for pay, for others… tell us a bit about you!)?

During normal hours, you will find me working for Service Ontario, hitting the gym and my local Chinese restaurant for date night with my derby wife. I have two fur babies in the form of a crazy orange cat Ginger and her adorably sweet loving champagne coloured sister Scottie.

What are your derby and/or real life goals for the

Derby goals for this next year, to jump the apex! As well as improve/fine tune my footwork.

Personal goal, to get rid of my gas guzzling car for something more economical… Or maybe just move closer to Kingston!

What’s a fun fact about you?

I can roll my tongue upside down and I am hopeless at getting metal lids back on jars.



The Dead rise in Oakwood

The Skateful Dead travelled through rolling hills to the flat plains of Oakwood, Ontario, to go toe-stop to toe-stop (and sometimes elbow to face…oops) with the Peterborough Jamazons. It was a crowd-pleasing match, with the lead flipping like a stack of slam cakes.

The Jamazons were hard-hitting and some kind of fierce, knocking the Dead jammers out of bounds like cooked spaghetti and executing perfect strategy to force jammer cutting penalties. It took the Dead jammers a few jams to figure out how to penetrate the Jamazons’ formidable green wall of death, consisting of seasoned skaters Lucid Lou, Jaxalottapus, Lemon Tart, and MVP blocker Iggy Popper.

By the seventh jam, the Dead had a 24-point deficit, and while the scoreboard said they were down, they were never out. It was time to rise from the Dead. “Twenty-four points is nothing,” declared Boney L’ass, before stealing an outside-line pick meant for the opposing jammer and scooping points to narrow the gap. Caume-a-Kazi, in her fluid jamming style, followed suit by gliding by on the outside line on one foot to seize the lead, while Dead blockers Coop du Jour, Booty on Duty, The General, and No’Tori’ous Knockout held the Jamazon jammer. Game on.

The Jamazon’s jammers were forces to be reckoned with, too. MVP jammer Crazy Mama zigzagged across the track like a lightning bolt, and Pip Tatters stopped hearts everywhere when she jumped the apex at the first of the final whistles to steal four points from the Dead.

Undeterred, the Dead’s tornado walls recycled relentlessly, forcing the Jamazons to fight for every inch of track real estate. At any one time, fifty percent of Dead blockers were skating backwards so they could look those Jamazons right in the eye and watch for their own jammer, as Frigger Skater did, when she grabbed the front of CM Tower’s shirt and whipped her clear out of the pack. The shirt-whip was born.

By the final jam the Dead were down by six points. It was do or die, and the Dead do not roll over. Boney L’Ass burst through the pack to take the lead, while MVP Coop du Jour and soul-crushers Wilson, Newey & Improved, and Frigger Skater tore a page from the Jamazon playbook and forced a cutting penalty on Crazy Mama, who was promptly tossed into the box. Hammering another nail into the coffin, the Dead blockers then grabbed a goat while Boney racked ‘em up on a power jam.

But would it be enough? Crazy Mama was released to do her worst, while the clock ran down and the whistle blew to signal the end of the bout. All skaters were sent to their benches to wait, with bated breath, for the final tally…140 to 136 for THE SKATEFUL DEAD!

Banger Management is All-Ontario!

KDG’s very own Banger Management is heading to Portage La Prairie, Manitoba, as part of Team Ontario to represent the province in the ‘Toban Tussle Tournament. Team Ontario will be facing off against teams from Manitoba and Alberta in this battle for provincial honour and Banger’s teammates include some of the very best roller derby players in the country. We couldn’t be prouder. Go Banger go!

School’s Out for Summer!

There was some schooling last Saturday night!

The first game of our most recent home bout saw the Skateful Dead pull out a nail-biting win against Lindsay Roller Derby in the very last jam. Early in the game Newey and Improved was injured, shaking up the Dead lines (fear not — her leg isn’t broken!) Dead vs Lindsay Amazing blocking meant that the Dead got lead jammer several times, even when the jammer thought she was taking too long breaking through the pack. An amazing hip whip was given to CM Tower by The General, catapulting Tower through the opposition and out of the pack to score! The final jam was the one to see — the Skateful Dead thought they were going to be able to take the win, but then a penalty against Caume-a-Kazi started nailing the proverbial coffin. But what’s this? A penalty on Lindsay’s jammer? Eyes brightened, spirits rose, and derby karma abounded as Kazi got back into the jam to score four more points, bringing the final tally to 183 to 180. The Memorial Centre shook with cheers. Dead for the win!

As everyone headed to the beer garden by the Mansion or for tacos by Mission Street North (due to the extreme stress of that last jam!) the Disloyalists warmed up for their bout against the Durham Derby Devils. The game got off to a great start as the Disloyalists took the lead using their “four in the door” strategy. Before half-time, we saw an amazing move by LaVallee of the Dolls as she hit out the opposing jammer, then forced a cutting penalty by pulling her back around the track all the way to the pack!

Disloyalists v DurhamHave you ever wondered what happens when the jammer loses the star helmet cover? The Disloyalists haven’t — a perfectly executed play took place when TyKnee Smasher went to the penalty box for losing the star. Thankfully, a very sneaky Banger Management scooped it up and kept it safe from opposing blockers. When TyKnee reentered the track, Banger passed the helmet cover to her and the game continued legally. Smooth moves by the Disloyalists for sure!

Couple that fantastic jammer action with Mr. Kristi‘s constant hugging of the inside line, an “Eat-the-Baby” flawlessly executed by Manic Breeze, and some all-around great blocking, and you end up with a 209 to 98 win for the Disloyalists.

KDG would like to thank everyone for coming and give an especially big shout-out to our amazing volunteers, without whom we could not do what we do. Be sure to join us for our next home bout on July 19th as KDG takes on Oswego: the Rogue Warriors play the Port City Sirens, while the Disloyalists will be unleashed on the Breakwall Bombshells. Check out our Facebook page for your chance to win tickets!

Skateful Dead Captains: “Zombies are People, Too”

As everyone knows, the Skateful Dead are a force to be reckoned with in the international roller derby community. But they bring more to the track than grit, grace and sheer athleticism. With their next Kingston bout fast approaching this Saturday, Rogue Warriors investigative reporter Bluestocking sat down with Skateful Dead captains Frigger Skater and Coop du Jour to talk about zombies, derby, love, and life.

Skateful Dead captains Frigger Skater and Coop du Jour. Photo credit (and apologies to) Cat London.

Skateful Dead captains Frigger Skater and Coop du Jour. Photo credit (and apologies to) Cat London.

BLUESTOCKING: Thanks for talking with me today. In the past several years, the Skateful Dead have become a beloved Kingston institution—your popularity knows no bounds. Where did the idea to start an all-zombie team come from, and why roller derby?

FRIGGER SKATER: Hey, well, derby is just fun, and we love to play! But the idea to form a team originally came from a desire to gain some positive visibility and acceptance for the undead in our society. There’s a lot of anti-undead sentiment out there. Even if most people know better by now than to make jokes about undead individuals just shambling around moaning “brains, brains,” they still don’t necessarily recognize the richness and diversity of the undead community. We hope that the Dead can be ambassadors for the sport of roller derby in the undead community as well as ambassadors of the undead in the derby community. But it’s not always easy to occupy that role.

BLUESTOCKING: What are some of the frustrating stereotypes that you face as a zombie team?

FRIGGER: First of all, people call us zombies, which is just wrong. The term is undead.


FRIGGER: And then they’ll ask us if we’re slow zombies, like in Night of the Living Dead, or fast zombies, like in World War Z. But of course it’s very offensive to suggest that there are only two types of undead. Undead individuals come in all shapes and sizes; we are fast and slow; we have a multitude of interests and talents. That’s why roller derby is such a perfect sport for us: there’s such an acceptance—a celebration—of different personalities and body types and levels of aliveness in this sport. When we’re playing we don’t say “Hey, this opposing jammer is fast so we’ll send out our fast undead” or “We need to slow down the pack so we’re sending out our line of Night of the Living Dead undead”—we say “Send Newey and Improved, send Smackniss Evermean, send Polly Slamory.” We’re all individuals and we all contribute differently to the team.

BLUESTOCKING: Do we have a long way to go before people accept undead individuals as an essential part of society?

FRIGGER: (sighs) You know, it’s been a long lurch to acceptance for us. We’re just tired of people acting as if undead issues are entirely different from other social concerns. Like, you get all these blogs talking about what to do in the event of a zombie apocalypse. You do what you would do in any other widespread socio-economic catastrophe: Educate yourself. Reach out. Listen.

BLUESTOCKING: Would you say our culture’s current obsession with undead individuals like yourselves is actually a displacement of widespread alienation and despair resulting from the climate of mindless consumerism inherent in the capitalist oligarchy which effectively constitutes our so-called democratic political structure?

FRIGGER: Yes, definitely. But at least it helps us sell our merchandise, which helps to fund training and travel for the Kingston Derby Girls as a league. We have stylish T-shirts available at our bouts in all sizes, and in both fitted and unisex styles. I’m not going to say that wearing a Skateful Dead shirt, or any other fantastic KDG merch, will protect you in a zombie apocalypse…

BLUESTOCKING: …but it just might save your life?

FRIGGER: No, I’m not going to say that.

BLUESTOCKING: Are you ready for the next bout?

FRIGGER: Oh, definitely! But I doubt they’re ready for us! We’ll be playing Lindsay Roller Derby June 21st right here in Kingston at the Memorial Centre. It’s a double-header with our league-mates the Disloyalists, who are playing the Durham Derby Devils. $10 in advance, $15 at the door, doors open at 6 pm. It’s going to be a great game. We’re going to win it for ourselves and for the undead everywhere.

BLUESTOCKING: I’ll certainly be there cheering you on. Coop du Jour, you’ve been pretty quiet. Do you have anything to add?

COOP: Braiiiiiiinssss!

BLUESTOCKING: The more you know. Thanks for talking to us, and good luck on the 21st.

COOP: Braiiiiinnnnsss!

FRIGGER: It’s been a pleasure.